Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Why Don't Black Women Date Outside Their Race???

I have a question for black women. Why is it that only a small percentage of black women date outside of their race? Black men have been doing it for years. If the black man is not willing to commit to a black woman, marry a black woman or be a father to his children, then why wouldn’t you consider dating outside of your race? We are a dying race, so I am not trying to encourage it; however, if multitudes of our women can not find happiness in black men than I can not discourage it either.

I give a lot of credit to the black woman. She is the strongest woman on the planet. To be able to deal with the black mans unwillingness to commit, infidelity and willingness to date outside of his race effortlessly. She also raises our children, the majority of the time alone. And she still stands by her black man unwavering.

Forty-five percent of black women in America have never been married, compared with 23 percent of white women, according to the U.S. Census Bureau's American Community Survey in 2006. There are many reasons that this happens. One would be that black men are willing to shack up but never get married. We have all heard the phrase "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free." Another reason may be that once you are divorced he will lose half. Yet another reason is that women are becoming more educated and successful and may over achieve their male counterpart. Not to mention the men that date outside of their race, are on drugs, incarcerated, or on the down-low.
If there is a shortage of "Good" black men, then why limit yourself to black men? Why continue to be over-looked, disrespected, and mistreated? If a White, Asian, Latino or any other man for that matter is willing to put you on a pedestal, respect you and treat you good… why not give him the opportunity?

Is it the chocolate skin? Is it the myths about penis size? Is it a lack of chemistry? Is it fear of being ridiculed by family and friends? Males of other races may be more likely to have his stuff together and a plan for getting married and having children. It seems as if Asian women and Black men are both dating their white counterparts. A new trend is Asian men and Black women… Is this an option or just a trend? If black men are unwilling to step up to the plate than maybe you should consider another option. As long as you find somebody that treats you right and makes you happy... does it matter what they are?

I would like your feedback on dating outside of your race.

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  1. Trey,
    I will tell you why black women are reluctant to date outside their race. I know thatmost of our men are at the bottom rung when it comes to how they treat us, but every once and a while, a black woman will run up on a true brother, ready for it and even if he doesn't stay true for the duration, "let me tell you from experience" there is nothing else on the face of this earth that can compare to a "black woman" and a "black man" when they CONNECT! I don't care how many women of "other" races a black man dates, lives with, or marries. A black man cannot experience the true depth of having a "SOUL MATE" unless he surrenders to a Real Sistah, we were made for each other! "Say Amen Somebody"!

    Jacquelene McKinney

  2. As I have gotten older ( I'm 38), I have been more open to the idea of dating outside my race. I have always gravitated to people most like me ( I am first generation immigrant) so that meant someone of latino or caribbean descent, but a man is a man and a woman is a woman, no matter what the race. And lately, more white men are approaching me and I am not going to rule anyone out at this point in time.

  3. Black women love brothers. Period. It's our downfall though.

  4. I have always been about the black man, however when I hit 38 and was still single I had to re-visit my options. Alot of black men that I know where either tired of black women or into younger women. So to open my dating pool I became open. However was I have noticed is that men of other races have a problem with appoaching me. They may look, smile, but they keep it moving. So I am really not sure yet how to get them to actually come over and say, " HELLO HOW ARE YOU" but I am wide open. Black men have been dating outside of their race forever. Its our turn ladies.